Engaging Strangers: The Communication Edge in Proposals

As bid and proposal professionals, we often communicate with strangers or people with whom we only have a slight acquaintance to get the needed information to create winning proposals. We frequently trust that they are giving us the best data for completing our jobs. However, trusting without verification can lead to misunderstandings, miscommunications, or even worse—wrong decisions that impact our proposals’ success.  This blog offers five tips for achieving the communication edge when engaging with strangers.

Case Studies of Interactions with Strangers Gone Wrong

In his 2019 book Talking to Strangers, Malcolm Gladwell shares several case studies where miscommunications with people who are strangers or acquaintances can have disastrous effects:

• Neville Chamberlain and Hitler Case, 1938: British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain believed he could gauge Hitler’s intentions and character through face-to-face meetings. Chamberlain trusted Hitler’s assurances of peace, which led to the Munich Agreement. This agreement, however, failed to prevent World War II, showing the dangers of misinterpreting a stranger’s words and intentions.
• Amanda Knox Italy Case, 2007: Amanda Knox, an American student in Italy, was wrongfully convicted of murder. Italian authorities misinterpreted her behavior and perceived cultural differences as signs of guilt, highlighting how biases can cloud judgment and lead to incorrect conclusions when dealing with strangers.
• Sandra Bland Case, 2015: Sandra Bland’s tragic encounter with law enforcement escalated quickly due to miscommunication and mistrust. This case underlines the importance of understanding context, background, and emotions in interactions, especially with those we do not know well.

Five Tips We Can Learn from the Book to Improve Our Communications

While these cases are dramatic, they provide valuable lessons for bid and proposal professionals. Here are some key takeaways and actionable tips to improve communications and ensure you get the most accurate information.

Tip #1: Verify Information from Multiple Sources

Gladwell’s book teaches us that people are not always who they appear to be, and their statements can be unreliable. In the proposal world, it’s essential to cross-check information from multiple sources. When gathering data or insights, always verify the credibility of your sources and seek confirmation from independent channels. This practice can help avoid basing your proposals on incorrect or biased information.

Tip #2: Understand Cultural and Contextual Differences

One of the core themes in Talking to Strangers is the importance of understanding cultural and contextual differences in communication. As bid and proposal professionals, recognizing these differences is crucial when working with diverse teams and stakeholders. Always take the time to understand the cultural context and communication styles of the people you interact with, as this can help prevent misinterpretations and build stronger relationships.

Tip #3: Avoid Assumptions and Seek Clarification

Miscommunication often arises from assumptions and unspoken expectations. Gladwell illustrates how assumptions can lead to disastrous misunderstandings. In proposal management, avoid making assumptions about what stakeholders want or mean. Instead, ask clarifying questions to ensure you fully understand their needs and expectations. This proactive approach can prevent costly errors and enhance the quality of your proposals.

Tip #4: Build Trust Through Transparency and Honesty

Trust is a vital component of any successful interaction with strangers. Talking to Strangers emphasizes that transparency and honesty are key to building trust. As a proposal manager, communicate with stakeholders transparently about your intentions, processes, and limitations. Being upfront about challenges or uncertainties can foster trust and open lines of communication, leading to more productive collaborations.

Tip #5: Develop Active Listening Skills

Active listening is critical for understanding the true intent and meaning behind what people say. Gladwell’s book shows that people often miss cues or fail to listen carefully, leading to misinterpretations. As a bid and proposal professional, practice active listening by paying full attention to the speaker, acknowledging their points, and providing thoughtful responses. This skill helps ensure you accurately capture the information needed for a winning proposal.

Conclusion

Malcolm Gladwell’s Talking to Strangers provides profound insights into the complexities of human communication and the pitfalls of interacting with those we don’t know well. For bid and proposal professionals, these lessons are invaluable. By verifying information, understanding cultural differences, avoiding assumptions, building trust, and practicing active listening, we can improve our communication with strangers, gather accurate information, and ultimately create more compelling and successful proposals. In the competitive world of proposals, these skills are not just advantageous—they are essential.

Related Content

• Blog: The single biggest communication problem – and how to fix it

• Video: Crush Your Next Proposal with Orals Coaching

• Video: 50 words that call attention to your benefits, strengths, and discriminators

By Brenda Crist, Vice President at Lohfeld Consulting Group, MPA, CPP APMP Fellow

Lohfeld Consulting Group has proven results specializing in helping companies create winning captures and proposals. As the premier capture and proposal services consulting firm focused exclusively on government markets, we provide expert assistance to government contractors in Capture Planning and Strategy, Proposal Management and Writing, Capture and Proposal Process and Infrastructure, and Training. In the last 3 years, we’ve supported over 550 proposals winning more than $170B for our clients—including the Top 10 government contractors. Lohfeld Consulting Group is your “go-to” capture and proposal source! Start winning by contacting us at www.lohfeldconsulting.com and join us on LinkedIn, Facebook, and YouTube^(TM).